I love teaching my DIY Mindfulness classes online to tweens and teens because I’m more present to who I’m being moment to moment. My intention is to be a living example of the lessons I share, so I was a bit ashamed when I tried to dodge my responsibility for opening a broken window in my kitchen.
I didn’t realize the window was broken when I lifted it to enjoy the fresh air. It got stuck a few inches up before I saw the grey duct tape my husband Thomas had put on it to secure it closed. I jiggled the window, pushed on it and even banged it to get it closed. Nothing. It stuck there, midway, slightly askew, laughing at my useless determination. I quickly closed the curtain to hide my blunder when Thomas came in from his Starbucks run.
As we chatted, I cringed every time the curtain billowed from the breeze blowing through the cracked window. “I hope he doesn’t notice”, I thought while I half listened to his story and crept towards the stairs to make my escape. It was his day off and I knew he had a few things planned—fixing a broken window wasn’t one of them.
I kept picturing myself talking to my students about the power of making responsible choices in their lives, yet here I was avoiding mine—what a hypocrite! My shoulders hunched over and my spine compressed as I unsuccessfully willed the curtain to stop blowing.
Even though it was just a window, this small choice of not speaking up was quickly undermining my peace and joy.
I’d almost made it out of the room when I decided to take responsibility for what had happened. I stopped creeping and said while pointing, “Hey, I was trying to open that window and it got stuck. I didn’t realize it was broken, sorry.”
“Yeah, that’s why I had taped it. Our windows are old and some need replacing,” he said.
“Oh. I just wanted some fresh air. I never open that window and didn’t see the duct tape until it was too late.”
The window had no screen and was positioned perfectly for geckos, frogs and mosquitos to venture in and make themselves at home if left open too long. Also, we’d be turning on the air conditioner soon, so having an open window would totally waste electricity. It had to be fixed right away, not in a couple of days, and I obviously couldn’t do it.
Instead of being annoyed with me, Thomas immediately went to work fixing the glass pane. He had the window out of the bracket and tools splayed so quickly I had to move to get out of his way. No negative attitude at all. My hero.
I went upstairs guilt-free and peaceful; my shoulders raised, my spine straight! I hadn’t let my discomfort control me. I didn’t let my childhood angst of fearing being in trouble win out. I dealt with the window head-on—I was being what I teach in my DIY Mindfulness course and what I want to model to my daughter.
The bottom line folks, each choice I make either has me feel powerful or less than, even the very small ones. A powerful life comes from making powerful choices. And that’s totally on me!!
Are you living a powerful life? Are your kids blaming or being responsible? Who are you being at work, in social groups? What is being reflected back to you from those around you? If you don’t like what you see, you have the power to change you!
Share your thoughts below 🙂
#mindfulness #kids #blame #responsibility #parenting